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So we all dressed nice and made our way to the restaurant in a corporate car. I haven’t described the other two women all that much and need to give a short intro. Nadine is another woman who grew up in New York City as Helen and I did. I’ve already described she and her husband as nearly inseparable…rarely seeing one without the other except for one nearly daily instance. Her husband Steve was a guy who was always running/jogging around the neighborhood. Anyone who didn’t know him referred to him as ‘the runner’. Nice guy, very quiet, into his children. Helped coach his kids in sports. Smart and nice looking guy. Nadine was very doting around children and not just her own. I don’t think anyone would not have absolute trust in her taking care of her children. As much as Nadine and Steve were seen together I never saw them touch each other in anything which would be considered a sexual fashion. The always were extremely friendly to each other and you never heard them utter the. I cant understand his reaction. Ive known him forever, but I have never meant anything more than a friend to him. He was a source of happiness to me because of the feelings I had harbored, deep feelings for him. Hiding them from him when I couldn’t be with him. I could never tell him my feelings for him when I finally understood just what they were and how strong they really were. It was a secret I always had to keep. I tried so hard to forget them, to forget him, but it was impossible. Starring up at him now, I realized just how impossible it really was to forget him, or the feelings I felt for him, especially when all those feeling can rushing back. I looked up at him and hated myself for causing the look of pain on his face. ‘Please Jake, just let me go.’ I asked. I sounded and felt defeated. Nothing I could do would ever be right. I would never be right for him, I am too weak, too lost. It would be too unfair to him to have to save me, to fix me, I’m not savable, not fixable. ‘I.
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